Is It Better To Give Than Recieve?

Today I was given something...for free, but I protested, "Are you sure it's okay, I can just have it, just take it? It feels so wrong!" I think I even asked that more than once. The person who was giving me this stuff just laughed and looked at me contemplatively.

"You seem to have an issue with receiving!"

I paused and thought about that. I wanted to protest, because that would be another imperfection in my character, wouldn't it?

"Yeah, I guess I do, now that you mention it". Thinking back on other times people have offered to help me or give me something for nothing in return, I always protest...always want to give something back.

"But you probably like giving to others, don't you?" this person asked me.

"Yes, I love it!"

"This may speak to heart issues you have, you probably have trouble receiving from your Heavenly Father, don't you?" He asked me. "You feel the need to control situations instead of receiving His provision for you."

Oooohhhh...that makes all kinds of sense in my life. My credit card, for one. It speaks directly to the issue of receiving blessing from God. I don't wait on Him, or even ask of Him. I try and figure it out on my own. And then my generosity gets me in trouble. I need to tap into the blessings God has for me in my own life and then I can give to others without putting it on my credit card and stretching myself beyond our means. A win/win situation.

I thought that I just had some trust/faith issues, but receiving...hmmm, that puts things into even greater perspective. All of this, just from going to a bookstore this morning.

And on that note, we've been working through a faith issue about selling our house. We need about $2000 to finish up everything to the point of putting it onto the market in the condition we would like. We automatically thought Oh, we can just go to the bank and take out a small loan, pay it off when we sell and be done with it, everyone does it, it's totally normal! But then I thought about it a little more...

We just finished going through a week where we literally had to trust God to come through for 3 different payments that we didn't have. Even though they weren't big ($35-50 each), something from nothing is still impossible! He did come through and it was amazing. Miraculous, even. So then, what's $2000 to God. We decided to give Him the chance to prove His provision to us in a bigger way. He's proved Himself faithful in the small, now we will sit back and wait for his blessing and His timing. It's not all about NOW...instant gratification. We don't HAVE to sell our house right now, we just WANT to. In our culture want vs. need is a very blurred line. I asked Jer to remind me of this when I doubted. Sure enough, the very next day I saw a "For Sale" sign on the front yard of someone we know and instantly dealt with jealousy. "How come they can just decide to put their house up for sale and do it, while we have to sit here and wait?" Enter Jer, "we don't HAVE to wait, we decided to wait, remember? Faith?" Oh yeah. Thanks Jer. And thank you God for your blessing in our life and the patience to make it.